find me here…

I was going to have a separate blog just for writing about weight loss surgery, which would be this one, but it’s too much of a pain.  So….you can find me here  https://just1reason.wordpress.com at my other blog…my everything blog!  See ya there!

Reality bite

Well, here I am, 4 days out from surgery.  It’s probably a good thing I didn’t write before now, as if I could, because you would not have wanted to hear from me!

The surgery went well and was without complication.  Lasted a little over an hour.  The hospital here is one of the best in the nation, and I’ve had four children in it and love it, but this day they had no room at the inn for me.  So, I was stuck in the recovery room, without my husband, for 7 hours waiting for a room.  Not cool.  They said I was having a very hard time with the pain.  That was an understatement.  I have read and heard many people say that this surgery was easier than a c section.  They lie. I’ve had 4, I should know.  This was the most painful, terrible, horrible medical procedure I have ever been through!  I was not one of those happy, cheery, thankful people the day after surgery.  I was miserable, sorry and angry.  So angry.  Every time I woke up feeling pain, I was so mad at myself for doing this to myself.  I felt like I was pregnant with a chain saw!!

Okay, so I’m getting a bit better day by day, but still not happy.  I feel like I did when I was pregnant.  I had terrible pregnancies.  Everything tasted so bad, made me so nauseous, and I was so exhausted all the time.  Same now. I know this gets better, just saying.  So, now I feel like I’m pregnant with a 15 pound snapping turtle, so it has improved.

One thing I told my husband today is that I wish I had gotten a handle on my health 20 years ago and not had to go through this.  If I had just had the knowledge then.  He asked me what I thought about sharing my experience with kids in school.  About not caring about or understanding health and nutrition growing up, and how to PREVENT ever getting to this place.  I think that is something I may seriously consider.  Because this surgery was that painful and that terrible for me.

Honestly, if I have ever seen a video, a real documentary of the pain someone goes through in the days following this surgery, I would not have gone through with it.  I’m not a wimp, but I guess when it comes to pain like this….I am.

Well, no turning back.  I can only go forward.  So…here I go.

2 days to go!!

And it has gone by so quickly. Simply because my mother was taken to the emergency room on Sunday for an intestinal blockage due to a hernia. And with 7 brothers and sisters, that means I’ve been on the phone non stop for 4 days! I’m exausted just from the phone! lol! Mom is doing great. All put back together, and feeling better than she’s felt in years.
Now for me….2 days to go and I feel like I have a million things I want to get done first. Nesting! lol! Moved the furniture around, trying to get caught up on everything, make a grocery list for hubby to take care of while I’m in the hospital, get all of the Christmas decorations up….man, I need a nap! This hospital stay is starting to feel like an upcoming vacation for me! I can dream, right?!

7 days to go

This is a TERRIBLE week to be on a pre-op diet!! I have failed at it terribly the past two days, to say the least. Thank God I’m still a week away. Gonna have to kick it in overdrive starting tomorrow. sigh.
I am so looking forward to my back not hurting anymore. The way my weight is distributed, after 5 pregnancies, makes my body feel like it’s still pregnant. Blah. I spent some time today just imagining my new healthy, lean body. My hubby said we can get a gym membership this winter for the family..woo hoo!! I love working out, so that is going to be great!
I think I’m going to make some grocery lists and meal plans for post op. Get prepared now, so I don’t have to put so much thought into it later.
Hope everyone had a happy Thanksgiving!

11 days!

Woo hoo!! Got a bit nervous today. But it was in the midst of a flesh fit of wanting chocolate. So I’ll “choc” it up to that lol! Once I had my brain back all was well.

excited!

16 more days!! I’m so excited! I’m getting more and more excited as the day gets closer:) I thought I would get more and more nervous, but apparently not. Maybe I’m saving that for the actual day. Maybe it’s because I’ve had 4 c sections, one I had to be put to sleep for, so this doesn’t seem much different to me. Much easier actually. Except this time…I’m the new baby! lol! With how the eating progresses after surgery, that sure is what it reminds me of. Anyway, just needed to let off some WAHOO! excitement:)

blah

I hate it when I have one of those days where I just feel blah. No energy, no passion, no drive. I’ve seen this change in me over the past year that my health has changed, and am very hopeful to see this change back once I’ve had surgery and the weight starts falling off. When things start going wrong with your health that cause you to feel sluggish, it just seems to seep into every area of life. It will be good to be a 30 something year old who feels 30 something years old again, instead of 50 something!

17 days and counting

17 days and I take yet another step in my journey of life toward wholeness and health.  On December 4th, I will be getting a RNY Gastric Bypass.  Yay!!  I am very excited about it.  I haven’t hit nervous yet.  I’ve hit a few things in the past week, but not nervous.  I could put my whole story on here today, but I’m not going to yet.  I just need to write about what’s going on in me right now first.  I mean, there’s not very many people you can just strike up a conversation that begins with “hey, I’m having my insides rearranged and at this moment all I can think about is how happy I am going to be when I can walk up the stairs and not feel like I ran a marathon!”

I’m over the whole issue of being worried about what everyone will think.  I haven’t received ANY negative feedback from anyone I’ve told, can you believe that?  I mean, really, when the people who know you have watched you spend 20 years going on and off every diet, weight loss program, exercise program, vitamin program and support system under the sun and STILL need to lose 1 30 pounds, who’s not gonna be happy for a life changing solution?

Yes, I’ve gone through all of the why, how, when about getting this way.  And while understanding certainly is a big key in the journey, it is surely not a magic wand.  For that matter, neither is weight loss surgery.  But Information+Understanding+Knowledge+Prayer+Desire+Commitment+RNY= My Recipe for SUCCESS!  Might not be yours…but it is mine.  And I am ON MY WAY!!